October 6, 2019

I’ve honestly lost count of how many fertility meds, scans and appointments I’ve had on the road to conceiving my take home baby.  At what point do we say it is like an addiction?  Am I gambling away my time and money?  There are no guarantees and yet I keep doubling d...

October 14, 2018

Loss.  It has taken on a dimension of meaning I had never fathomed prior to battling infertility.  I relish the English language and I habitually choose my words carefully in order to convey my thoughts.  When I had my miscarriage, the word “loss” offended me.  It didn...

October 2, 2018

However despite all the data, the data that says I have a 1% chance to conceive at my age (or conversely a 99% chance not to conceive), I persist.  I am a woman with without regrets and I intend to remain so.  I will deeply regret it, if I don’t see this through…to it’...

September 23, 2018

Lot’s of “what if’s” along the way, but in an ideal state, I get a little baby growing in a dish and implanted back into my uterus for safe keeping and growing for 10 months. Talk about taking baby making out of my hands!

May 28, 2018

This will be IUI #5 for me.  Notwithstanding, it will have many firsts though.  It will be my first procedure at this clinic.  It will be the first time I will be using fresh donor sperm, instead of frozen.  It will be the first time that intercourse will also be invol...

April 23, 2018

I received a phone call from the office of my OBGYN that informed me my blood work indicated that my pregnancy would not reach full term. I was meant to miscarry my baby at some undetermined point in the near future. I was gutted...figuratively, soon to be literally. T...

April 16, 2018

I told her I was so sorry to hear about her multiple miscarriages and told her that I had one last year and was still in therapy trying to process it.  "How many did you have?"  I asked gently.  She looked me square in the eyes and plainly noted "Seven.&...

April 11, 2018

I have to be careful. I love him and that makes me vulnerable. As a rule, I try not to make business decisions based on emotions. The goal is to be logical about anything that has long term or financial implications. But isn’t making a baby, the one time I might be a l...

Please reload

Be alerted when a new journal entry is posted!

Enter your email address below and click Subscribe.

Categories

Archives

Please reload

©2018 BY SIMPLY TANIKA